What do I say to a teenager to help her become a woman

For a young girl, becoming a woman is a wonderful and magical experience. Here are seven essential things to say to a teenage girl to encourage her to grow into a confident young woman.

What can a father or mother say to their daughter to help her become a satisfied woman who is aware of her own beauty? Claire de Saint-Lager, author of the book be a woman Mami, gives excellent clues. She is the founder of Graine de Femme, a program that helps young girls get to know themselves better and reveal their unique personality.

1“Being a woman is a blessing”

Claire de Saint-Lager asserts that “becoming a woman is an experience that must be rooted in joy.” A unique and wonderful experience during which a girl learns to know herself and unfolds. She realizes her beauty, value, and feminine qualities and learns to see them as a gift.

2“You participate in God’s creative work”

It is good to invite a girl to honor and be proud of her female body: one day she will be able to become a mother and thus participate in God’s creative work. Invite her to see her menstrual period, for example, not as “painful” but as a sign of “good health indicative of the body’s ability to reproduce.” In some countries, at the time of menstruation, “girls are celebrated as a wedding or bat mitzvah, it’s a big celebration,” notes Claire de Saint-Lager. Why not create a small ritual to celebrate this important passage, by presenting a small gift, a jewel, or flowers?

3“You are a unique and unique woman”

The child’s first attachment point and identification is his mother. “In the beginning of life there is a lack of differentiation between the bodies because the child thinks he is one with his mother.” This link is essential. Over time, it is necessary to “encourage your daughter to follow her own desires, to develop her own talents and talents,” stresses Claire de Saint-Lager. “It is essential to encourage and appreciate what is unique and unique.” For this, it is good that she is also inspired by other women around her, thus she can build a personal path.

4“You are the heroine of your life”

Encouraging the desires and dreams that the girl carries in her heart is beautiful and kind. For Claire de Saint-Lager, “Adolescence is the age when we dream, when we dare, when we have everything to paint.” You have to trust them, listen to them and at the same time accompany them step by step. “You don’t decide your life at 15. It’s something that will be built over time. We’ll lay the stones first, maybe take side roads, and then follow others. Orientation takes time. What’s important is that we give meaning to each step and dare to take risks.”

5” You are beautiful “

Encouraging a girl with words and appearance is key: she complements her appearance, what she has accomplished, her beauty. “You could have the most beautiful girl on earth, if her dad didn’t tell her she was beautiful (in the broad sense), she wouldn’t believe it. You’ll look for that answer elsewhere,” explains Claire de Saint-Lager. Help your girls find their own unique beauty: is it manifested in generosity, gentleness, intelligence, humor…?

6“Love yourself and make yourself loved”

“Loving yourself is a long process, but it begins with the ability to surround yourself with people we feel good with and who want us well,” Claire de Saint-Lager says. It is important for a girl to look for friends who will respect and raise her. If she lacks trust, she may fall into toxic relationships that will not be beneficial. “Choosing our friends also shows our self-esteem.”

7“You are God’s beloved daughter”

Adolescence is also a time to reconnect with intimacy and spiritual life. Claire de Saint-Lager stresses the importance of this inner listening that opens up to the divine, “for that heart to heart with who lives in me and who is intimate with my being.” “It is important for a girl to know that she is loved and that she enters into a loving relationship with the Lord. It is as if the Heavenly Father says to her: “You are beautiful, you are my beloved daughter.”


be a womanClaire de Saint-Lager, Mamey, March 2022, €19.90.

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