Couple and routine are actually two words that go hand in hand. This is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, routine allows for the development of a reassuring framework, and habits can provide a sense of security. But routine is also synonymous with boredom, and this is a problem in a romantic relationship. Because in order for the couple to continue without losing the flame that drives them, we must not take everything for granted.
On the contrary, it is a daily business for partners who want their relationship to continue. However, the routine tends to make us believe that automation is sufficient and that it is no longer necessary to work while maintaining spouses. Objeko So he invites you to discover the five tips of clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst William Bona. Talk to our colleagues from the magazine Top Health It provides reliable evidence for igniting the torch. And to be honest with you, it’s a topic regularly covered by media of all kinds. In fact, everyone wants to know the secret of love that lasts forever.
Couple and Routine: How do you keep the flame?
Allowing routine to settle into your marriage is not inherently bad. In fact, it’s rarely the people who manage to have a romantic relationship that lasts without it showing up. Living together assumes a routine, shared habits, and a stable framework. But it is equally important not to let it take precedence over the romantic feelings of the partners. Indeed, when the routine is in place, it is also necessary to know how to expedite it for the benefit of the spouses. Surprising your partner and taking the couple out of their comfort zone is indeed one of the tips given by the psychologist he interviewed Top Health. And for good reason, routine can be killer, even for couples who still love each other.
Communication and initiatives
To combat the bad side of routine in a romantic relationship, you have to dare to take initiative. Because it’s so easy to miss each other after 20 years together. It’s easy to take your better half for granted and overlook the little romantic touches. However, according to William Bona, a little attention is necessary. It is they who will positively affect the relationship of the partners in the spouses. Also, such relationships cannot be healthy without beautiful complicity, a form of satisfying communication.
In fact, the second advice of a specialist is based on communication between spouses. According to him, it is necessary and Objeko You can not conflict with it. Partners in a romantic relationship should be able to listen to each other and talk to each other with kindness and respect, he says. Because, what is more egregious than insinuations or taboos in a married couple? Nothing is worse than these two components to influence a partner’s confidence. They trust each other but also the self-confidence of both parties. Finally, if communication is king, it’s also because it means not ignoring stress points. There is no spouse in the world who can argue and agree on everything. Thus, healthy communication makes it possible not to ignore potential sources of conflict and to deal with them at their root.
Adherence and acceptance
To keep the flame in the spouses, you need to know how to be attentive, the specialist specifies. Attentive to others, attentive to self but also to its environment. So the couple is represented as a third entity in the relationship. The other two are partners in their individuality. The observation then is knowing how to look in the same direction when caring for a couple. But he says he also knows how to recognize the warning signs. Don’t take anything for granted, for example, and thus avoid communicating on the level of blame rather than the level of gratitude. These are two more tips in one, which in the end consists in knowing how to monitor faithfully, bearing in mind that absolutely nothing is obtained.
Finally, William Bona invites readers Top HealthAnd Objeko They will do the same, to accept the reality of their spouses. Without resignation, it is also necessary to recognize when all efforts were made and nothing worked. Then he explains that it happens that it is impossible to kindle a flame in the spouses. But this is not an admission of failure. In this case, success lies in the partners’ ability to accept reality and mourn their relationship. And on this last point, we must not confuse amorous flame with ardent passion. The first continues while the second dies after a good few years.